Tracey Jackson » QUESTIONS ANSWERED

Jul 30, 2009

QUESTIONS ANSWERED

I don’t know about you, but this FRESHMAN MOM has a lot of questions.

There are so many things we don’t know and end up making educated guesses often times from an undereducated place.
FRESHMAN MOM website is pleased to have Dr. Carol Maxym adolescent specialist and author of the best selling TEENS IN TURMOIL on call for the next two weeks to address our concerns and answer our questions.

I met Carol while making LUCKY DUCKS, she is insightful, practical, full of experience and a total straight shooter

I thought it would be helpful for all of us if we could have our questions responded to directly by a professional.

So this is how it goes…you send the questions to –

Tracey@TraceyJacksononline.com or if you have my direct email that you can use that.

I will compile the list for Carol who will answer them all and they will be posted two weeks from Monday. That will be Monday, August 17^th on FRESMAN MOM just in time for the big day.

Not to sound cliched but no question is too big or too small.

Wondering about how much money each month to give?

Do you give them a credit card?

How often do I, can I call?

How much stuff do they really need?

What happens on Sunday if I haven’t heard from him/her by two pm and I’m pulling my hair out?

If they are really, truly homesick is it OK to go up and take her to dinner? Opps- think that was mine!!!!!

How do I deal with my own sadness?

HOW DO WE NAVIGATE THESE NEW CHOPPY SEAS?

Send em in and my guess is many of us will have many of the same questions…but at least we will have some answers.

Have great weekend! Help is on the way!

Freshman Mom

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Posted in Freshman Mom

christina juarez

i somehow think that although it is SO difficult for mom’s like us to sit back, be patient and WAIT..I think we need to follow their lead. Perhaps we might tell them thats the strategy. Something along the lines of….. “This is going to be tough, if it were up to me I would call and text every minute of the day but I am going to try and follow your lead…within reason” HA let’s see how long I will last and how many glasses of wine I will need to drink to maintain my resolve!!!!!! Perhaps we should form a support group.
http://Blitzerfamily@yahoo.com Lynnda Blitzer

I have a friend that worked out a very interesting way of handling communication while her son was at school. They decided on a “once a month” meeting. On the first Monday of every month she and her son agreed to have a conference meeting. She would drive to the town where her son was attending school and they would take care of all the business at hand. Money, professors, peers, study habits, stresses, pressures etc. This arrangement worked well for both of them because it meant that the mom knew that on the first Monday of each month she would be brought up to speed and the son knew that he would have some time to try to handle the problem on his own before bringing it to his parent. He also knew that he would have his mother’s undivided attention on the first Monday of every month. They met in a public place so that the conversation would be respectful and calm. The separation in the first months was easier to bear because they both knew that there would be face time on a regular basis… and that any issues would be discussed and could be revisited at the next meeting if the issue needed more work. The month in between gave her son a chance to deal with his issues on his own and gave him a month to do it without his mother nagging him every day about whether or not he had “taken care of it”.

I realize that not everyone will be able to arrange meetings in a cafe’ but taking care of college type issues in this business like way makes sense to me.

One of the advisors at CalArts ( where my son will be attending school in the fall) suggested that before school starts parents and students should work out how many times a week calls home will be made and on what day and at what time of day so that everyone is aware of what is expected of them…with the idea that, of course, a call could be made in the interim if there is an emergency.

I love the idea of having someone help us through this, someone who is a professional. The questions on your list are also on mine…money, credit cards, cars, nights out in the city (off campus) etc etc. I will compile my list of worries and send them on to you! Thanks!

xxooLynnda