HO-HO- HO – NO- NO-NO

Freshman arrived last night at around eight-thirty pm.

Let’s put it this way, if I blog right now I will end up writing all sorts of things I will regret.

I suppose that says it all, doesn’t it?

I have not laid eyes on said freshman, who dropped bags in hallway, left and has only been heard from after four texts requesting to know that said freshman was safe – that call came through at midnight from a bar where I couldn’t hear her.

I did in defense know she was going out and said it was fine as long as I knew she was safe. But at one pm without a word the next day it has passed that point.

And sometimes I say things because they are what I think I have to say as opposed to what I want to say.

I did at one point say what I wanted to say which was I think going out is great but your first night home in a month don’t you think maybe, if you are so happy to be coming home, something she kept saying, then maybe sleeping here would be a nice idea?

I don’t care what time you get back, but sleeping here would be nice.

Didn’t listen to me on that. I dropped it.

First thing her sister did this AM was go in her room and see made up bed.

“She never came home?”

“Nope, don’t forget your backpack”

The oh-so-fabulous Salva arrived at nine.

“Where is Taylor?
“Beats me. I think I will make chicken tonight do we have any in the freezer?”

It is now one pm – not a word. I’m finding this rather intolerable to say the least.

Her excuse is we are going away for two and a half weeks and she will be stuck with us and no friends.

Stuck in Tokyo, Bangkok, Cambodia and Viet Nam.

Life certainly sucks, huh?????

Is the message the only way we see you is if we take you on around the world jaunts?

OH MY GOD I’VE ENDED UP BLOGGING.

But you know I started this thing and I have gotten soft in many ways. If it’s about the truth, this is my truth in freshman land on December 18, 2009.

That book I didn’t like, the one that told me the way they would behave, the one I found full of mis-advice… well, I now find it comforting to know this is all the way it goes with many freshman.  They said never expect to see them, they only want you for money.

We won’t even talk about the overdrawn account and how I have to handle that today.

I am not alone, nor have I done anything wrong which is usually the first place I go. I blame me, when things have nothing whatsoever to do with me.

And this case they don’t.

I was cool– see your friends, let me know you are safe– but now I feel I was played.

I wasn’t even home when she got there, I wasn’t nagging “Where are you going? Hang up your coat up!” I was happily listening to Steve Tyrell with my husband.

On a nice note, it was my tenth anniversary two days this week. Yes, two, we got married on two different days.

The best ten years of my life. The smartest thing I EVER did.

The one person on the planet I trust after years of being surrounded by those I couldn’t or have proven I couldn’t.

When you have parents you can’t count on for anything it leaves you very untrusting of the world and very dubious of connection, but Glenn has taught me otherwise.

Would have been nice when I got back last night if there was a little card on our pillow wishing us a Happy Anniversary from the freshman, if would have been nice to have had it acknowledged at all by said freshman, ah well.

Today I am going to close quickly with a quote from our guru Larry.

“My serenity is directly proportional to my acceptance and inversely proportional to my expectations.”

I will repeat this eight hundred times before I go to sleep tonight.