Tracey Jackson

Dec 16 2012 | 15 Comments

WHAT TO SAY?

It’s very hard to sit down and say anything new or insightful about the horrendous tragedy and fall-out that took place Friday in Newton, CT.

One keeps hearing “my heart goes out to them,” the families who lost their children while they assumed they were safe in the confines of their schoolroom.  But what does that really mean?

Glenn and I sat in bed last night crying at different times while  “Forty Eight Hours” rolled out their version of the story.  But what difference does that really make?

Twenty families are now without their five and six year olds.  Children who no doubt already had presents from Santa wrapped and waiting for Christmas morning will not be alive to open them.  Children who have rooms full of toys, beds with a favorite stuffed animal, drawers full of socks, and nighties and favorite t-shirts will never come home to use them again.

Sometimes my mind wanders to the specifics when I put myself into one of those parent’s shoes. And as a parent I imagine what it would be like to have to walk into those now uninhabited rooms, that are still full of traces of  the person who lived there.

But my fleeting sentiment as I return to the quotidian details of my families and my life does nothing to change their nightmare.

Nothing will change the horrific future of the families who lost their babies, and the children who lived though and witnessed the carnage of their friends and teachers, and the families who lost the seven adults who were killed in cold blood. Nothing can alter the lurid details they will be forced to grapple with for the rest of their lives.

Not any presidential appearances, endless news coverage, teddy bears and candles left scattered about the globe, albeit with the best of intentions, can change their new reality.

There is only one thing in my mind that can change anything  (though it’s too late in this case) and that is this countries senseless, hideous, careless, Republican backed, NRA funded policy on the right to bear firearms.

I seldom talk politics on this blog and I avoid it for many reasons. There are probably many people who would not  be able to guess where my political affiliation lies.  I have never voted for a Republican anything since the day I was given the right to vote. I’m not militant in most of my positions.  And I ignore much of what goes on in Washington.  But I have always been a staunch believer that people do not have the right to bear arms.

I don’t believe in shooting animals for sport.  OK, someone will now pipe up and say but you eat chicken and carry leather handbags. I do. You’re right.  I repeat I do not believe people should kill for sport. I do not think there should be target ranges scattered about like miniature golf courses.  I do not believe in the glorification of guns and killing in the media.  I do not think any Tom, Dick or Harry who could be an addict, suffer from mental illness or just be a hot head with too much beer in their bloodstream should be allowed to walk into any gun store and buy a gun and as many bullets as they want.
I do not understand how Lanza’s mother who clearly had a mentally disturbed child had enough arsenals in her suburban home to arm a drug lord.

And the thing that really pisses me off, really rises me up on my left wing soapbox is the fact that fucking Wal-Mart sells guns. They don’t only sell them they are their third best selling item; bananas being their first.  Wal-Mart sold ten million eight hundred thousand guns last year. Ponder that for a moment.

The fact you can walk into a Wal-Mart and come out with some Mountain Dew,  a mop, a giant can of Pepperidge Farm Goldfish and a rifle is so horrifying to me it makes me want to do something totally irrational, though I have no idea what that might be.

What kind of country are we that we allow this to happen?

What kind of people are we that something like the NRA holds such power that the government refuses to change the reckless laws?

What will it take for people to say NO, THIS IS NOT OK.  NO, some crazy, demented kid cannot walk into his den and load his car with assault rifles used in wars and storm into a classroom and kill twenty innocent children under the age of ten. Forget the age, it’s just harder to look at the faces of those tiny children. But we have  Columbine, the movie theatre massacre and the endless list of these crimes that after the initial coverage seem to have zero residual effect on anyone with any power.

One feels so fucking helpless in the face of all this.

The NRA or one of those other crackpot gun defending groups used to have that lame ass slogan, “Guns don’t kill people, People do.”  Well, sure, but it’s guns in the hands of people, perhaps sociopaths or other folks with severe or even minor personality disorders that kill people.  When you don’t know who is holding the gun then it’s a senseless argument. And how do you know whose hands those guns will end up in?

And as in the case with the Lanza family, the mom had bought all this ammunition. And then the clearly, by all accounts, crazy kid took them.  So there is no argument one can put forth except it should not be allowed.  We should not be society where anyone can be armed.  It has been proven time and time again.

The case can be made like with drugs, if someone wants to get something that is illegal they will do it no matter what.  And of course that is true, though often only to a point.

It is one thing to have to go to the trouble and expense of finding things from illegal sources on the black-market and another to be able to pick up a couple guns while doing the weekly grocery shopping.

It’s fucked up and crazy. It’s hideous and irresponsible. There is nothing any of us can do about. Which makes the whole thing even more distressing.

There is only one thing I am doing. I will never walk into another Wal-Mart as long as I live and tomorrow morning I am selling my Wal-Mart stock.  I know that is very one percent action in the face of this, but it is all I can think of doing.

I would ask anybody else who feels strongly to do the same thing. If you shop at Wal-Mart stop or if you own the stock sell it.

It’s a small step, but maybe, hopefully, in our dreams someday if enough tiny steps are made we won’t find ourselves or perhaps our grandchildren living in a society where days like Friday can occur.

Walls of Bullets at Wal-Mart

 

Guns at Wal-Mart

 

 

 

 

  • Michele Morro Rowe

    Although I do believe there is truth to the slogan that guns don’t kill people, people kill people. I also believe that there is not a reason on this planet for assault, high-powered weaponry to be available to anyone short of a soldier in the middle of a war. And that is an entirely different topic of discussion. I have no doubt that if guns were not available, those inclined among us to do harm to other humans would find a way to do it. But the difference is they wouldn’t be able to perpertrate the kind of carnage that we saw on Friday or at Columbine or Virgina Tech or countless other mass murders of the innocent committed by the truly evil.

    As a side note, I have been wondering about the mother of this murderer. Did she know her son owned Kevlar? If so, what mother that would not take note of her son purchasing /owning Kevlar clothing. Where does a 20 year old come up with the money for something like that. Kevlar is not cheap. Wouldn’t the first question to her son be “Why would anyone need that?” Even if she was a gun afficianado, why would she keep guns in her home if she knew her son “had issues”. I find it all mind-boggling. I too have spent much time crying and being grateful for my children and their safety. I agree wholeheartedly with you Tracey and Walmart will no longer be a place for me to shop. I am not an overly religious person yet this morning I felt compelled to attend Mass. Interestingly enough, the priest began his homily with the exact words as you did your blog, “What to say?” I think these words will resound in many hearts for a long time to come.

  • http://twitter.com/Tony_DiCaprio Anthony DiCaprio III

    Luke 23:34 Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.

    I admire you for your courage , If you really want to boycott WM I will support you.

  • http://www.gothamgal.com Gotham Gal

    fantastic post. you are spot on.

  • http://www.traceyjacksononline.com/ Tracey Jackson

    As always the points you bring up are important and well thought out. Your question about the mother and the clothing is a good one, but clearly in light of what her life appears to have been like it’s not surprising. What clear thinking mother has that many high powered guns in a home??????

  • pattismith

    “so fucking helpless”…I’ve put on the brave face all weekend for my 8 year old. After dropping her off at school this morning with my heart beating out of my chest, I finally allowed myself to grieve…still not done…the tears keep coming and coming. I will have myself together by the time I return to the elementary school to pick up my youngest (I will be the first in line btw).

    I do believe in the right to bear arms, but I absolutely do not believe that our forefathers had assault rifles in mind. Americans are famous for taking their “rights” too far, and this senseless tragedy MUST be the end of that kind of ungrateful entitlement that our society seems to believe it has. Our society believes it has the right to say and do whatever it feels…and whoever gets stepped on in the process, well so be it. I say that’s bullshit. It’s way past time for individuals to suffer the consequences of their actions, their “freedoms” they choose to exploit for their own selfishness. If we are to survive as a society, we have to somehow return the next generation to a place where we all pull together for the common good rather than trample those who get in our way on the way to “the top.” While we may have the right to own a weapon, we do NOT have the right to have closets and cabinets full of them with enough ammo to “arm a drug lord.” We do not have the right to take away the rights of others…we do not have the right to endanger others…we do not have the right to destroy the lives of an entire town.

    Is it time to pick up my kid yet?

  • http://www.traceyjacksononline.com/ Tracey Jackson

    Thank you for both sharing your support and the quote. Though if they do not know what they are doing, should they be armed? I guess that is simplistic response to a Biblical quote but the world has become more complex since those words were written. But I appreciate all comments and all opinions. i wish you and your family a Happy Holiday.

  • http://www.traceyjacksononline.com/ Tracey Jackson

    Thx GG….We play for the same team.

  • http://www.gothamgal.com Gotham Gal

    ha we sure do.

  • http://www.traceyjacksononline.com/ Tracey Jackson

    So well said Patti, but where do we draw the line? How do we say who gets what and how much??? It is all too complicated. I totally understand what you feel about your kids and school. I just called my school to make sure my little one got there.

  • pattismith

    I don’t know, Tracey…I just don’t know.

  • Sheldon Bull

    In addition to boycotting Wal-Mart (I’ve been boycotting them for years just for how they treat their employees and destroy American jobs and town, here’s four more things that you can do today to help us move toward sensible gun laws in this country: 1. Go to bradycampaign.org and offer your support. 2. Sing the petitioin at: http://signon.org/sign/gun-control-now-1?mailing_id=7650&source=s.icn.em.cr&r_by=6427167
    3. E-mail your senator and congressional representative right now. 4. Don’t be intimidated by bullies. The next time a white male starts bullying you about gun control, get in his fat face and tear him a new one. These are immature men. You are smarter, braver, and stronger than they are.

  • http://www.traceyjacksononline.com/ Tracey Jackson

    Great ideas Sheldon. Thank you.

  • http://www.facebook.com/maria.b.stave Maria Bushkin Stave

    I agree with EVERYTHING you said. I have been so very sick about this. Last week I witnessed seven police officers take over 20 guns (A few like the one used to slaughter the children) out of someone I know’s house after the husband went nuts and blew all the windows out of the house with a shovel. He hadn’t been able to reach the safe where the guns were. Gun laws have to change. We can’t forget these people and just move on when CNN stop’s covering it. We all have the responsibility to fight the government and be able to go to a movie or mall of for christ’s sake send our children to school and not take them home dead.

  • http://www.traceyjacksononline.com/ Tracey Jackson

    Totally agree. What an awful though I fear not uncommon story you tell of the guns coming out of the house. Rage and weapons = disaster no matter how you cut it.

  • Penelope Bianchi

    Oh Tracey. How beautifully said. I agree completely.

    Every country has “mentally ill” or “developmentally disordered “people whose parents or (parent in this case) is in complete denial. This mother, although she admitted to her friends that her son had a “developmental disorder” somehow had the twisted idea that his learning about firearms would “help” him somehow.

    What a “twisted mind”!

    Early in the story; I said to Adam..”Sorry to say; this was the mother’s fault!”

    Sorry; I still do say that! She did not get help for this disturbed child; she did the opposite of what to do to help him. Sociopaths are mostly caused by mothers; most are attractive males, spoiled by their mothers who never hold them accountable for their actions; they never develop a conscience. There was more to this one. But, if the guns had not been available to him; had he not learned so much about guns and practiced with them, had they not available to him….this could not have happened.

    Those automatic weapons and all that ammunition she had stockpiled showed that she was unbalanced as well.

    She was his first victim.

    Had the guns not been “assault weapons” he may not have been able to kill as many as he did.

    I will not walk into a Wal-Mart.

    There are signs that this event is different from most. A big hedge fund is selling all their stock (they own 95% of the companies) in the largest gun manufacturers in the US.

    I have supported gun control since I was in the 10th grade and watched Walter Cronkite announce that President Kennedy was dead.

    What a losing battle. A frustrating goal.

    I worked on RFK’s campaign in California as a junior in college at USC; and was celebrating in the ballroom of the Ambassador Hotel when he won the primary. Rosey Grier announced that “Senator Kennedy has been shot; and is on his way to the hospital”. Awful.

    Perhaps, just perhaps, it is what the head of the “hedge fund” said today:

    Friday was a “watershed event”; ( that will change the way this country allows these weapons.) (They are selling all the stock they own in the “Freedom Group” (they are a group of companies which manufacture 95% of the guns made in the US)

    Europeans think that we Americans are insane; allowing, and making all these weapons. And; we are. I can only hope that this completely insane act will take us around the bend.

    I feel the same way as I did about 9/11. I think this problem will be easier to change. It is a question of stopping; just stopping this insane proliferation of weapons. INSANE!!!

    We are heartbroken as a people…..all over the world. And we should be.

    Americans should be ashamed.

    Completely ashamed.

    Until all these guns are rounded up and confiscated; I suggest their be an armed police officer stationed at every single school in this country. Every single one. That is the only thing that would have stopped this devastating horrendous event.

    Penny